Shrimpy’s Crypto News

Satire, Memecoins & Cryptocurrency News

strong woman makes fist

Validator feels validated every god damn day!

Local node operator and validator for several blockchains, Victoria Storm enjoys the confidence and self-assuredness that a giant pile of crypto assets can bring. “I have so much fucking money it’s not even funny. I’ve been getting airdrops since 2017 and was staking way before it was cool.”

Feeling the swell of power course through her veins, Victoria assures us her head isn’t getting too big. “I mean, it’s cool, people can sit there and diddle with their Coinbase accounts all day, but people like me are really the ones running the show. I’m like the uber-smart version of SBF, if he actually had street cred.”

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